The Incredibles is a fabulous movie. So when Michelle Malkin pointed to a quiz which asks “Which Incredibles character are you?” I just had to go check it out. My result?

Which Incredibles Character Are You?
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I like that. (As long as my wife agrees!)  

A Texas rancher was bragging to the owner of a small farm in Illinois.

“I can get in my car at six in the morning, drive for six hours, spend an hour eating lunch, drive another six hours, and I still wouldn’t have reached the end of my property.”

“Yeah,” the farmer replied, nodding sympathetically. “I had a car like that once, too.”

The topic of skydiving recently came up on one of the mailing lists I subscribe to. The following exchange was part of that thread:

I never understood why anyone would want to jump out of a perfectly good plane.

Nearly all airline crashes occur when the plane hits the ground. Leaving the plane while still airborne, greatly reduces ones chance of being involved in an airline crash.

[The trick is to know WHEN to leave….]

Reposted with permission

I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did!  

A friend of mine sent me these definitions which you won’t find in any dictionary. I hope you enjoy them as much as I did!

(If the definition doesn’t make sense right away, try saying the word out loud.)

Arbitrator: A cook that leaves Arby’s to work at McDonalds.

Avoidable: What a bullfighter tried to do.

Bernadette: The act of torching a mortgage.

Burglarize: What a crook sees with.

Control: A short, ugly inmate.

Counterfeiters: Workers who put together kitchen cabinets.

Eclipse: What an English barber does for a living.

Eyedropper: A clumsy ophthalmologist.

Heroes: What a guy in a boat does.

Leftbank: What the robber did when his bag was full of money.

Misty: How golfers create divots.

Paradox: Two physicians.

Parasites: What you see from the top of the Eiffel Tower.

Pharmacist: A helper on the farm.

Polarize: What penguins see with.

Primate: Removing your spouse from in front of the TV.

Relief: What trees do in the spring.

Rubberneck: What you do to relax your wife.

Selfish: What the owner of a seafood store does.

Sudafed: Brought litigation against a government official.